Everything seems unfinished. I craved more time, but I had to accept the cruel reality. I always do. I am used to fight against my bad luck, but now I believe in destiny, and everything is getting much easier than before.
I like this time of the day. It is quiet, and I don't feel anyone else's presence. It's so late that morning is going to come again. I am enjoying the peaceful time, but also so afraid of a new day's coming. In one or two hours, I have to go to sleep as I don't want to be awake when I have to accept the fact that a new day has come. I feel so giddy but so happy. I am happy that I am totally lost. Lost in a corner of the world.
Why I am in North America-- why I am in Canada? Why I have to go back? Did I ever think about these questions? I am not escaping--I hope not as I have enough courage to go back, but I am so scared that the moment the plane lands, all the beautiful memory that I had might vanish. I keep telling myself that all the beautiful things have an end--they always do. We come into this world alone and leave exactly the same way. I am going to treasure those warm and foggy days here. I enjoyed visiting Queen Elizabeth Park; I liked the restaurants here; I had a good time in the Chinese garden; I also liked the busy seabus.
I like the darkness and peace in the middle of the night, but even the night that I like is going to have an end--I don't want the morning to come yet.
Xiaoyue, it is my sincerest hope that the good experiences, memories, and people that you have made and met here will always be with you. The term "watershed experience" describes a time in one's life which makes a huge difference in terms of the direction of one's life. I hope that your stay in Canada will give you more confidence, joy, and strength.
ReplyDeleteThis is so sad
ReplyDeletebut as Nathan said
nice memories never fade and they will make your bad days better
Thank you Nathan and Mohammad.
ReplyDeleteI think so too and according to the TED talk we just listened to, sometimes experiencing self is not good, but remembering self is better:)